Not all things we do on computers translate well to meatspace.
99 karma · joined July 25, 2017
Not all things we do on computers translate well to meatspace.
Sounds like a conservative kook.
Backstory: I'm a late-diagnosed Aspie, 56 in a couple of weeks, only diagnosed in my mid 40's. Had a small number of long-term relationships, and had trouble understanding why the earlier ones ended, until I was diagnosed. Nerdy as a kid, with few friends. Avid D&D player until my early 20's (same set of low maintenance friends, with a well understood social contract). Computer geek; SciFi nerd; etc.
I am the architypical introvert - uncomfortable in large social gatherings. I went for nearly 10 years without anyone other than my partner that I could call a friend, but was "mostly happy with my own company". Most "friends" were partners of my partner's frienship circle.
About 5 years ago, I started up a makerspace, and kind of "instantly" gained a friendship circle in a town where I basically knew nobody, and that was "fine" but occasionally tiring, until this summer when I basically burnt out and quit. I still have some of the friends, but I'm seeing far less of them now we have no common interest in the makerspace. I'm still trying to work out what my "next big thing" will be. At least I now know how to go about starting whatever it will be up...
But I think the main issue is that I find the social aspect really tiring (I think it's masking fatigue). I just can't handle large amounts of the social stuff. Fortunately, my current partner of about 15 years is very supportive and understanding, and decidedly not introverted.
But since nobody else seems to have done so, I will. Globally, names don't follow any common format or concept at all that you can reduce to a formula. My takeaway is that it's best to have a free-format "full name" field, and another "preferred name" field so you can allow people to choose how to be referred to.
Tech: Linux, FreeBSD, Python, BASH, Shell, GOLANG, C/C++, Arduino, Raspberry Pi, Perl, PHP, HTML, Apache, NGINX, MySQL, PostgreSQL, NAGIOS...
Email: andy [dot] darcy [dot] jewell [at] gmail [dot] com
About: I'm a seasoned Linux admin and scripter/coder with literal decades of experience in the IT industry. I can do maintenance on your Linux server - esp Debian or RHEL derivatives, write utility or automation scripts for your business processes or write custom plugins for your vertical web app. I'm also pretty handy with tiny systems like Arduino and RPi.
We are a small, local charity, and this is a massive step for us - we just need a boost to assure our future!
I moved away from my home city about 20 years ago, and outside of work, I had no real friends apart from my wife, for about 10 years. Previously, I'd generally just "shared" my partner's friendship circles but this isn't ideal, as I've found don't have many interests in common with most of my partner's friends, which is awkward. I didn't consider myself isolated, or even recognise a yearning for friends in myself, but it does take a psychological toll.
I accidentally solved this problem by forming a makerspace and later, repair cafe - and this has bloomed into a decent, manageable (for me) friendship circle. I'm still not a massive party-goer, but then I'm in my 50s, so that's probably normal!
Welcome to our world, "normies" :-).