28 karma · joined December 14, 2019
You want to do these side projects to show to yourself that YOU can do it. Focus on the problem not on the skill.
Never underestimate people's idealogical beliefs even under strain.
1. What am I doing that I should continue?
2. What am I doing that I should stop doing?
3. What should I start doing
If manager is open, you can say same things about her.
More succinctly:
1. Start
2. Stop
3. Continue
I agree that my comments could be harmful if it was the only one, but there needs to be balance in advice.
I assume this person is "successful", may be that's the faulty assumption.
Think about this, if you were in a room with Jeff Bezos, Mark Zuckerburg, and Bernie Madoff, how much talking would you be doing?
Not that much.
social media and shame culture makes this silly to attempt.
measure how often you're talking vs. they are if the split isn't 80% in their favor you're doing it wrong.
I found that lifting or intense cardio helps me move out of my funks.
When I'm suffering through an intense workout I don't think about anything else. When I finish the workout, I can be so exhausted that I pass out and go to sleep. that in itself is a blessing.
Lastly, so much of stress is self-imposed. You are where you are, and whatever plans you have, are determined by you.
Be safe. Good luck.
Sample Example
(0 Layer) CEO --> 10 Direct reports is typical for large publicly traded companies.
(1 Layer) C-Level --> 6-8 (10,000 / 8 --> 1,250)
(2 Layer) SVP / VP -- > 6-8 (1250 / 6 --> ~200)
(3 Layer) Middle management (200/ 6 --> ~30)
(4 Layer) Line managers (1-25)
If someone said I'll do full-stack dev for 150k instead 400k at google, how would you take that question?
At the very least read Ben Franklins autobiography.
Fourth path: You learn what you need from it, that the world is just various inputs into your brain and gives you perspective to slow down.
As an aside, your post is full of negativity. I hope you get the help you need somewhere.
Some people attempt a almost a fact based conversation that is an exploration of a topic. Others have an opinion they want to push on others. I don't even try to figure out what someone agenda is. I look that there is one and stop focusing too hard right there and then.
I also suspect, I'm not the only one who operates like this.
If I have an agenda, it is to limit emotion in communication and make things more fact based.
This communication is likely to fail.
To reiterate, many people don't care to figure out what the agenda is and just ignore those who has one. Here i'm using agenda to stand for the typical partisan politics or other "normative" behavior.
By the way your line of questioning implies an agenda. I don't have an issue with that, but thought I'd highlight that for you.
hmmmm? one does not follow 2