EuroHikikomori

> Damn, that is hard to hear. Is it because you don't think the project is good enough? Will you get to a point where you don't delete your projects?

It not so much that, I have enough time to work them into perfection, but there is no use for them after completion. It's not like when an employer request some work to be done that is going to be used afterwards, it's just me trying to make op some project ideas.

I don't socialize online at all as it would quickly feel like a burden to me.

I don't work freelance or have any income at all, but I'm very low maintenance as I don't eat much and don't like material possessions. All I own is a few computers and a toothbrush, but I don't have any debt either. I think it would be impossible to make my life more minimalistic than it is now.

Once a month I do my laundry and all other time is spent at the computers. I work on a project for some months, delete it after completion and start over with a new project.

I think my parents has gotten ‎acclimated to it as the change was gradually over a long time and not from one day to another.

The hospital for a check-up.

I wouldn't say it was an active choice, I didn't even known about hikikomori until very recently, but the description fits my lifestyle.

I went to trade school and graduated as a network technician/systems administrator, but I never got a job and then time just went on and suddenly I hadn't left my home for years.

I wrote in my first post, I'm sad I missed out on so many things in my youth, but sometimes I think the reason why I'm sad is because I have been conditioned by social conventions to believe that I should be.

If I had been going to parties in my twenties, according to social conventions, I wouldn't have missed out and should be happy, but what if I should be true to myself?

I have actually never really enjoyed other peoples company and had I been invited to parties, there is a great chance that I would just stand awkwardly in the corner waiting to go home.

I do get extreme enjoyment from programming and doing other computer stuff alone, and I'm able to do it 24/7. Maybe I actually have the most fulfilled life that I could ever have, following my personal preferences, but social conventions are preventing me to acknowledge it?

It's a double-edged sword.

I have been living as a Hikikomori for the last eight years. Every two years I leave my home for a few hours, but I spend the rest of the time in front of my computers.

I don't have any friends in real life or online and the only people I interact with are my parents.

Every meal is prepared for me so the only thing I have to do is my laundry once a month.

I often think about how fast time flies when living this lifestyle. A year feels like a month to me.

The sad part is that I have missed out on most things a normal person experiences. The twenties for most people is about experiences, creating lifelong memories, parties and fun. It feels like my twenties was over in the blink of an eye and left a book with empty pages. My youth has run into the sand.