michepriest

Thank you!

They’re fun to read

Could there be a workshop where you have to have a certain level of experience or training in order to use the tools?

With high risk tools someone could be on staff to do that part of the project

I’m more curious about what people are passionate about and wanted to ask the question in a different way than what would do if you won the lottery

Build from your notebook as in software?

I’m new to submitting on HN. Thanks for letting me know. It seems like they don’t allow editing

I’m more curious about what people are passionate about but wanted to ask in a different way than if you won the lottery…

What business excites you?

I love this answer

I imagine you’re not the only one Is there a woodworking space you could rent? Not sure if those even exist.

Sorry, new to HN. Not sure how it works. I’ll look up how to edit and fix. Thanks for letting me know

I’m curious about what people are passionate about and wanted to ask the question in a different way than the usual if you won the lottery

I was at a job where one of the co-founders raised his voice at team members on my second week there. I stayed for over a year. If I could go back in time to that point I would quit. The burnout and blow to my confidence took years of recovery

They asked for exercises to think and speak more clearly. Getting regular, focused experience on listening can help with this

I used to work at a venture studio where we could negotiate giving up a portion of our salary for equity

Don’t think about what you want to say. When you think about what you want to say, you stop listening.

Instead listen openly, mirror to get more information on anything you’re unclear about. People love being mirrored (repeat the last thing they said but as a question- Chris Voss writes about this in ‘Never Split the Difference’).

Get enough information until you understand the gist of what the speaker is trying to say from their point of view. Stay curious. Refrain from making assumptions or assigning any judgement. It’s easier to persuade when you deeply understand their view and why they have it

You can practice getting the gist in conversations you observe but aren’t part of. Then in group settings you’ll start finding yourself saying, what I think so and so meant was… Added benefit is when the other person feels heard and you help advance the conversation for all participants, you’ll be seen as a great conversationalist

Remember it’s not about what you want to say. It’s about how you want the listener to feel during the conversation. Make them feel heard, earn their trust. Earn their trust, persuade them of anything

I used to have a financial planning business. We helped over 600 clients. I’ve seen it all. Buying dream home right away works for some and not others. Waiting is better for some and not others. Depends on so many things.

The interesting thing we learned was doctors and lawyers tended to be horrible with money. There was a lot of “keeping up with the Jones’s” which caused a lot of stress.

If you’re at all thinking about starting a business in the near future, do not buy the most you can afford. Having a big mortgage impacts how long you can take to get your business off the ground. Having said that, you’ll want to get a mortgage while you have employment income since being self-employed makes it a lot harder to get a mortgage

Where it worked for couples to max out early was with those with a predictable path that had job security with significant increase in pay, those who got a windfall or had help from family, and those who had the right business at the right time. Also, those who bought in the right area. The nicest area doesn’t always appreciate the most.

The fact that you withdrew your offer means something didn’t sit well with you. There will always be another dream home. Another commenter mentioned buying a fourplex, living in one unit and renting out the others. That’s a great option to look into and learn more about.

If you look at who’s wealthiest in society, it’s the business owner. It’s awesome that you’re exploring that avenue. Just make sure you’re managing your risk well. Also, the wealthiest are landowners. Lots to explore beyond conventional wisdom which hasn’t been working like it used to

If you and your fiancé aren’t aligned with this decision it might help to know that you’ll be able to buy a nicer dream home once your schooling is done, your career is underway, and the credit card debit is taken care of

I’d recommend getting tested for things like OCD, ADHD, etc. If you get some kind of diagnosis you can work with your employer to make accommodations so work with you when you spiral. A compassionate manager will see the benefits of the way your mind works and can help you navigate it when it goes too far. Work with a professional to give you tools and strategies to manage

It makes hiring difficult

On the worker side it could lead to imposter syndrome which causes mental health issues

It’s pervasive so roll with it and manage yours and others’ expectations

Also try user experience testing. You pay a nominal fee to watch users use your product and say their thoughts out loud. I was always surprised by what they said and thought about what we created. The only thing is you need to set up a good testing plan.

+1 for The Mom Test

Something I did which was highly effective was set up a Discord server to watch users talk about my product with each other. Doesn’t have to be Discord. Can be a Facebook group, sub-Reddit, etc

1. Rest

Move (gym and weights yes! also anything physical you liked doing as a kid)

Breathe - learn to meditate. There are tons of methods. Find the one that's right for you

2. Express gratitude - openly and with journaling

Focus on being a better you tomorrow than you are today. Define "better" in a healthy and meaningful way

3. Do a digital detox for 3 weeks. Read a book. In your first sitting read for as long as you can. Then add a page a day or a couple of pages a week.

Meditation

Learn to cook one meal better than anything you could get at a restaurant.

I've been burnt out twice. Once to the point of being on short-term disability for 3 months. I've also risen in my career from door-to-door sales to leading an AI based technology startup. Here's what I recommend to get the reset you need:

Step 1 - Reset your mind and your body:

Get rest. If you have the resources, quit your job and rest.

Move. If you're not exercising, start. If you are keep doing it.

Breathe. Learn to be still and meditate. The best meditation technique for me at that time was Vipassana (it's free and they feed you + give you a place to stay). I also learned about self-compassion meditation on this podcast https://jackkornfield.com/tim-ferriss-podcast-jack-kornfield...

Learn how to be kind to yourself. Stop comparing yourself to others. Instead, figure out what you need and want. It helps to keep a gratitude journal. Sounds silly, but it's highly effective.

Reframe. You did not waste your youth. You did the best you could with what you knew at the time. You want better for yourself now. This is the beginning of the next phase of your life. It's also really uncomfortable so manage your expectations.

Step 2 - Reconnect with anyone from your past who made you feel good about yourself. Ask them what they see your strengths are. It's often hard for us to see our own strengths because our strengths come easy to us.

Step 3 - Follow your curiosity. Want to draw? Set yourself up for success. Don't say I want to draw then grab a pencil and not be able to draw. Take a class or watch a YouTube video. If not drawing, anything. Relearn things you liked doing as a kid but stopped doing. Find something to do that's not work. It will serve you well when you do work.

Step 4 - Up-skill. Whatever it is you're wanting to achieve, talk to people who are where you think you want to be and see what they did to get there. Then do those things.

Talk to a minimum of 5 people in that position. Better is talking to 20. Listen carefully for things they don't like about it. If those things go against your nature, you may want to rethink what you want. I've built things from scratch. I've had 7 career changes and my own business. Each time I thought it was what I really wanted only to get there and decide it's not for me.

Step 5 - Meet new people in the area you want to be in. Join meetups, online communities, Slack groups, etc

Whatever your next move is make sure it's not at a culture of overwork. You're right about your hourly wage. Better to work 40 hours a week for that wage and have 20-30 hours a week for your own projects. Don't worry that you haven't made any of them big. Having a grand slam is going out of fashion. Now people are building boring businesses and making multiple small bets so they can own their time and improve their quality of life. One of your strengths is you have a good work ethic. Have some of that work be for yourself.

For inspiration, check out Daniel Vassallo's Portfolio of Small Bets cohort course. It's a community with many devs among others building a bunch of things (info products, e-books, e-courses, microSaaS, e-commerce, and more) with the idea of investing in themselves and their own portfolio of products.

Also check out the boring business movement for some ideas on reframing away from building from scratch. @Codie_Sanchez on Twitter and Nick Huber on YouTube are a couple of big names. Try a bunch of things. Don't expect to get it right on the first try.

It's not about working hard or working efficiently, it's about working effectively. Focus on that and you'll get there but not without learning how to be kind to yourself. Otherwise you will constantly get in your own way. For me, I've accepted this as a life long struggle. Being aware of how I can be down on myself helps me catch it before it becomes a problem.

You have everything you need to live the life you want. You just need a reset. I wish you all the best

Pay them real money not equity

Advice: Build with no-code/low-code in public many tests to find what works best and build your audience along the way

I'm working on this now. Officially started January 1 of this year but giving myself a few months of grace because I hit a few bumps in the road with some family stuff.

I'd spend the first 3-6 months creating info products (e-books on gumroad, amazon; e-courses on Udemy/Coursera). Once those are up and running spend the 4th month on t-shirts and merch with print-on-demand and sell via shopify/etsy.

Take free cohort-based courses and do paid ones with the proceeds from the sales of the info products and merch. Set up affiliate links once I have a bit of an audience. Set up systems to automate all along the way.

Mix in some freelance work to start and build websites and apps with no-code. Share my journey on Twitter and YouTube.

Because I have money I'm adding podcasting and will buy Google and Instagram ads once I see some traction.

I started by doing 100DaysOfNoCode. This is free and taught me how to build stuff on the web. It was a great way to generate business ideas. I've made a bit of money from a few of them. The one that's getting the most traction is micro-coaching with UnstuckIn15

The fastest way to a lot of money is offering cohort-based courses but you need a solid reputation to make it work. With these courses if you charge $199 and have 100 students for a 3 week course that's $19,900. Do one a month and you're basically there in 5 months. Caveat is being able to get 100 signups per month. It's the internet, and you have access to people all over the world.

The best thing about this strategy is not having any obligations (no investors, employers, or employees).

I'm thinking I'll make around $50K this year. My goal is to eventually make $1 million a year mostly in recurring revenue. I'm thinking that'll take 10+ years, but it's the internet so who knows?

The key is try a bunch of stuff. Like how VCs diversify, don't put all your eggs in one basket. Be consistent on your daily output. No matter what happens in your day, do something to advance your work.

I was in a bit of a funk when my dad passed away, and I got laid off last year. I didn't know what to do other than not have obligations (investors, employers, employees).

A friend of mine recommended I do 100DaysOfNoCode. That was a great suggestion. It's free. They send you an email every day with a 30 minute activity. The activities introduce you to a ton of tools. I learned about 20 new tools and built over 15 websites and apps.

Because you're starting with the technology you're almost forced to come up with business ideas.

I talk about it more in this loom video and also have 2 other ideas for generating ideas https://www.loom.com/share/22be41636f3a4c119f7e3d6497a03de4

I'm new to Hacker News so my apologies if video links aren't allowed

What I do myself and what I recommend is if you have a spark of inspiration for any idea, do something to action it (send an email, tell someone, build a landing page, etc). Follow your curiosity without expectations of any outcome. If you get early traction, keep advancing to the next step. Let go of things that don't interest you.

It's never too early to build something yourself. There are an insane amount of tools and opportunities. Imagine if you built 1 thing a month and had 3 things a year that you enjoy and generates a steady stream of revenue. Now image doing that for 10 years.

I'm retired from tech. Former product manager/intrapreneur and a bunch of other things. Burned out twice. Decided I was done working for someone else. Last year I sold my house with contents, rental property, business, and car to be nomadic and see the world.

I'm doing small projects for fun. My favourite is helping people get unstuck in 15 minutes with 3 questions. A few coaches have expressed interest in offering a similar service so it's accidentally turning into a micro-coaching business where people who don't normally have access to executive coaches and get help with something specific in a defined period of time.

My advice to people in tech who want to stay in tech, build stuff for yourself. If you're not sure how or don't have ideas, there are people who can teach you myself included

Relationships:

Spread kindness. Assume the highest and best intention of others. Ask questions out of genuine curiosity. Be generative. Tap into the listening of others and always respond with compassion and grace. Spend as much time as possible with people I love.

Health:

Move. Do something active every day that I enjoy and embrace the mantra, "I am strong in my body" (great for getting the most out of workouts)

Eat as much fresh food as possible. When a craving for junk food happens, think about how it will make me feel afterward then ask if I still want it. If yes, then enjoy fully.

Work:

Follow my curiosity. When inspiration strikes, do one small thing right away to set it in motion. Help others. Be generative.

Mental health:

Reframe "failures" as unmet expectations that need a bit of reframing so essentially, be kind to myself.

Embrace impostor syndrome. It means I'm learning, growing, and I care. Focus on how I can improve on yesterday vs comparing with others.

Work actively on self-acceptance.

Parenting:

Experiment, experiment, experiment. Try lots of different things and double down on the things that work that enable your child to be great citizens and confident in who they are.

Help children be in control of their emotions by putting words to their requests.

Help them be resilient by teaching them how to accept hearing "no"

It goes fast. If your youngest is over 3 and your oldest is under 11, this is the best time in your life with your children. They are old enough to do things with you and young enough to want to do them and have the time to do them with you.

On happiness:

Happiness is not a destination. It comes in moments. The trick is to be present when they happen. In 100 years what you've done with the majority of your time on earth won't matter much if at all. In 10 years what you think is important now won't be. In 1 year the extra time at the office, away from your family and things you love to do will be discarded for the next new thing. So don't miss your moments of happiness striving for some destination you believe will make you happy.

Remove things the decrease your moments of happiness (negative people, indecision, unhealthy habits, etc).

Ask high quality questions to get unstuck and create more moments of happiness

Thank you for your reply to my questions.

I don't have any reading materials to suggest. Calgary is known as being a "migraine capital." People talk about it with every Chinook (warm weather event with high pressure changes). There's a migraine forecast site https://www.accuweather.com/en/ca/calgary/t2p/migraine-weath...

I used the Migraine Buddy app to identify alcohol as a trigger. I haven't had a drink in 4 years, my frequency of migraines is reduced. I'm not sure where you log your headaches, but Migraine Buddy might be worth a try. They use the data to suggest ideas you might not have thought of otherwise.

I'm in a similar stage in my life. I want fulfilling work and to follow my curiosity. I also want a high quality of life which includes being healthy. I have a few suggestions to explore...

The question mark that's easy to time box and answer aside from the discomfort is London. Perhaps you can time box and commit to being there for a year to see if you would indeed be missing out on anything. While there, work diligently to build your research operation. This way you will know one way or another if you're missing out on anything. After a year, or sooner, you may have the data you need to make a more permanent decision. There is the risk of future relocation costs, but you can cross that bridge if it comes up.

See if there are ways to manage your concern with feeling better. That's much easier said than done, but I wonder if you have the expectation that it will be uncomfortable and don't attach the desire to eliminate it, if it will lessen the impact. Vipassana meditation is a technique that might help. Although you'd need to endure 10 whole days of silence (no talking, gesturing, eye contact, reading, or writing) which is mentally and physically (in the beginning before you learn the full technique) painful. The technique is powerful for pain management. The time away if you choose to take the course will also help you with your decision.

In advance of going to London if you decide to do so, research your options for triggers and treatments. Talk to others who suffer. See specialists if that's available to you. See what else you haven't tried. Seeing specialists may feel like overkill (I have a habit of being in denial about my migraines even though I've had them for 20+ years), but it's impacting the quality of your life enough that it's a factor in a decision as big as this.

Another option is to go to Zug and be content with doing what you can with what you have there. A client of mine said he wanted his company to be as big as Airbnb. I said being VRBO isn't a bad option either.

Another question for you: If you can imagine the best version of your company that's possible with the opportunities available in Zug, would that still be fulfilling?

I've made a couple of assumptions such as you not knowing about the Migraine Buddy app and not seeing specialists. I hope you don't mind. I thought it would help fast track the conversation. Happy to continue discussing further. A lot about your situation resonates with me

It sounds like you definitely want to leave where you are, and you'd be happy with either option. If this is not the case I would start with thinking about all of the options available to you and gathering more details about all of the options.

Assuming you want to leave where you are and you'd be happy with either option, I have some questions for you to contemplate:

1. About your manager - Much of work happiness comes from who you work for. Kevin Kelly says, "Don't ever work for someone you don't want to become."

When you look at who you'll be reporting to and their managers, who would you most like to be like?

2. About the industry - It sounds like the industry is a factor in your decision (HRMS vs IT MNC). Which has more growth opportunity for your career and less likelihood of being replaced by automation?

3. About the work culture - A company that's been around for 7 years is not a startup. I'm filling in the blanks here. If it's about company size, what type of working environment is a better fit for you?

A smaller company may need you to do work that's outside of your area of expertise. You may need to make decisions to get stuff done without a lot of guidance and oversight. If you like understanding what you're meant to do and how what you do has an impact, this may not be the right fit as you may do a bunch of work that doesn't get used as the company tries to find its footing.

On the other hand, if you like rolling up your sleeves and thrive with ambiguity, a smaller company may be the better fit for you.

I help people get unstuck for a living. I need a bit more context to be truly helpful, but hopefully this provides you with things to think about that help you with your decision. All the best!

First of all, congratulations on the success of your project!

Secondly, I'm sorry to hear about your headaches. I suffer from fragrance induced migraines as well as migraines triggered by pressure changes in the atmosphere. Calgary, Canada was terrible for me. I moved to Vancouver, and it's been a game changer.

I have a few questions:

1. What are all the ways your headaches impact your productivity?

2. What are all of the options available to you (other than location)?

Sounds like these need to be full-time cities for you to grow the AI research team. I'm wondering if a rotation could work or some other ways to grow the team without been in London full time. Options could include living outside of London and having the team come to you for their "off-site" a few times a month. I lived in Dorset. It's gorgeous there. Probably too far from London for you, but perhaps there's something workable.

3. What are all of the risks with all of the options available to you?

For example, missing out on talent by not being in a hub like London (an assumption to validate), not forming deep bonds by not being in London full-time (tons of ways to address this), etc. A risk analysis may help bring clarity to your decision.

I help people get unstuck for a living. Hopefully these questions help somewhat.