kirstendirksen

Every time I post a story with a prefab ADU company the pricing is usually the same -- starting around 120K for a unit with kitchen/bath etc-- and the comments are equally similar: "too expensive". I remember Jay Shafer (tiny house pioneer from late '90s on) talking about how tiny houses aren't tiny priced because you still have to build a bathroom, kitchen, electric, etc. Still hoping someone can figure out a solution to make a truly tiny-priced tiny house.

My husband would agree with you that happiness doesn't need to always be the end goal. I must have been raised with a Disney reality. Though I've realized I do need the sad; it's what helps me to think in a more complete way.

What freedom to feel you could pack up and move in an afternoon. I love the idea of knowing that is possible, even if it never happens.

Funny how so much of what we have is "just in case": not just space in our cars, but extra clothes, extra linens, extra plates...

The photos of your apartment are great. It looks amazing, not at all like someone trying to "opt out", but something out of a style mag. Though I shouldn't be so surprised as simplicity is an important element to good style, or what I see as that.

I would make a similar comment to you as I made above to MrFoof. Maybe because it fits with what feels right for me, but I like your 6-month-rule and your question for every object.

In many ways I think when we get too much stuff the same thing happens that happens to kids when they have too many toys. They seem to lose interest in all of them. So we put most of them away in drawers and pull them out a few at a time. It's as if without all the clutter of lots of toys around our daughter enjoys herself, and the few toys, much more.

I would also repeat my comment to MrFoof that if you're interested in contributing to my documentary, I'd love to see some visuals of your de-cluttered lifestyle.

I would agree with you that to a certain extent people crave roles that can give them an identity, like that of treehugger or entrepreneur. But I also think there are people who genuinely happy with either one: like many of the people posting comments here, I think genuinely want to start companies because they enjoy the thrill of starting something, not just to be an entrepreneur or company president.

The same goes for those who choose to embrace a more simplified lifestyle or whatever related to sustainability.

Any interest in talking more about your downsizing experience and/or videotaping your "stuff"?

This response feels poetic to me. Well, that and it made me laugh the way you describe using it as an excuse to break off with your girlfriend.

But there's something that feels so right about living according to a principle seeking things of usefulness or beauty. And I'm very impressed that it truly seems you live this way.

I'd agree I used to shop more to have spare shirts, but now my spare shirts sit unworn and I simply wear the same few shirts over and over so I don't see the point in having the spares.

I can imagine it's much more satisfying enjoying, or watching someone or something, enjoy something you've made than something you've bought.

I'm curious how your venture beyond a cat treehouse goes. Would love to hear/see more about your experience making your own furniture.

Funny about the lattes. I am probably complicit in that criticism, but maybe because I'm usually happier spending my $100/month (depending on how many you buy) making my own tea/coffee and spending that same amount renting movies on itunes.

But to the real point, I think you- and Sethi- are onto something with it being more about figuring out what really makes you happy. If, it turns out, that what makes you happy are big houses and expensive cars or planes (I have an uncle who truly seems happy with all 14 airplanes he owns.. though he's an ex-commercial pilot who usually finds old planes he refurbishes and doesn't mind if they crash land in corn fields.. I witnessed that one) then I can't criticize that.

But I wonder if the majority of us really are happier with more and would be just as happy realizing that "enough is enough" and focusing on things that really make us happy.

One more point, I'm not out to say that there is only one route to happiness- and that it is an anti-consumeristic one-, but simply that it is possible- and possibly more common these days (given circumstances)- to choose this path.

This is simply a bit of counterbalance to so much television that sells the opposite stance. I know that on some of the tv shows I've worked on, I've been complicit in spreading this idea that stuff is cool. So perhaps this is my more personal response.

Wow. I hate to think I am just looking for affirmations. Maybe you're partly right since making a documentary (or just a long-format video or print project) involves taking an angle. I think I chose my angle simply because we do have a website focused on "sustainability" (though this a complicated term and doesn't mean we just fall in step with whatever "green" issues are popular.)

Over the past few years we've simply begun to hear more and more people talk about how the lifestyle they've chosen- often for environmental reasons, but other times not- is something that has made them happier. Maybe happier because they're freer from debt or from clutter or because they've learned new skills that made them feel more connected.

Happiness is an overly simple word for a very complex idea, but it's the best we've got to describe both our search for both short- and long-term comfort and satisfaction.

I'm curious. Why such a violent reaction to the post? We can avoid the word happiness, but what is it you strive for in life, both short and long-term? What do you like?

I enjoyed your blog. Though I'm curious about one of your final comments: "To be clear, I still want a bank-vault sized pile of money but I have accurately recognized why I want it. I don’t really care about a big house and a fancy car. I might someday; I don’t right now. My cramped apartment is sufficient. What I really want is the financial freedom to sit in a quiet room by myself and explore my ideas".

Do you really think you need the money for that freedom? Don't you think if you work at what you enjoy than you can find enough money to pay for your "cramped apartment"? It doesn't sound like you're averse to working, and I'm guessing there is some work that you'd enjoy that would pay for your basic expenses.

I say this because I had a similar idea as you while in college (and I also had read Rand and loved the Fountainhead). So I studied economics and thought I'd do some business thing for awhile to make enough money to be free to do whatever I wanted to do. But then as I saw the jobs that were open to me, I realized I didn't really want any of them. And then as I began to explore careers, I began to talk to more people who chose to work for money and never really got away from that (and some of these people were getting ready to retire) and I realized my plan could be dangerous.

I started thinking about how short life was and decided to just go for something that interested me. So I decided to find a career where I could interview people. I tried to get a magazine internship, but couldn't find anything. Then someone told me about a television internship open at the local NBC affiliate. I applied and spent the next 7 years at that station (after working for 8 months for free, living at home and doing odd jobs on the side).

Maybe I just got lucky, but I am relieved that I didn't stick with my initial plan to make tons of money and then do what I wanted. Now I love what I do and for awhile, made some good money at it. Though I've since voluntarily downshifted to live in Spain with someone I love and be at home more with my young daughters.

Travel is another point I've pondered a lot since I started our website. I used to fly a lot. In most aspects of my life, I can be a pennypincher, but it was the one area that I felt like the experience was worth whatever pricetag. Then I started reading about the carbon emissions of flying (and the emissions of kerosene jet fuel) and I started re-evaluating. So I started to pick my trips more carefully and to try to fly less and stay longer if I could.

While at first it was an environmental consideration, now I'm realizing I'm actually happier without all the moving around. My husband calls it my family's "pack-and-go" mentality. I'm not saying everyone would be happier this way- as I definitely had my share of years exploring the world/my country a bit-, but for now, I like staying in one place a bit more. And the curious thing is, I doubt I would have discovered that if I hadn't thought about carbon footprint stuff. I mean, the "pack-and-go" mentality is a part of my family culture: I live in Spain, my sister lives in Sydney, another sibling lives in the South, another in Seattle, my parents in San Francisco, another is married to a Canadian... it's tough to avoid, but possible to cut down a bit I suppose.

And now that my income is drastically reduced from what it used to be, flying really isn't an option like it used to be either. So I am grateful that I don't feel the need to move about like I used to. Though, that's not to say, I don't fly. I live abroad so every year we take one trip home. And that in itself is more than the majority of people. So all I can say is I've reduced my moving about, just a bit, and am happier for it. For now.

I wonder how many of us find clutter exhausting. My husband can't even start his day with too much stuff around the house (on the floor, hanging off chairs... that would be my contribution), but I am able to overlook it a bit more. Though since living with him, I have realized that even I would prefer to live without clutter.

Though somehow so many people can't seem to be able to hop off the stuff treadmill: buying, collecting, storing (I'm amazed at the self storage business in the U.S.) and trashing. I am not saying I'm always immune either. I think partly it's being aware of stuff collection as a problem (even just for your own sanity).

I like that term being "in flow". I used to hear the term being "in the zone" when I played tennis as a kid. One coach told me I needed to "be the ball" (I'm guessing this is variation on some Buddhist all is one motif). Though I never achieved that state as I never really liked tennis. I wonder if one type of happiness is finding that activity you enjoy enough so be able- eventually- to be "in flow" or "in the zone".

I am very curious as to your last point: "The metric for rating the size of your mark needs to change before we can even begin to move away from materialism". I think you're onto something as studies show that it's not how much money we make that affects our happiness as what those around us have. So it seems our tendency to compare ourselves to others is an important point here.

What do you see as the metric for rating the size of our mark currently? Our toys: home, car, etc.? Do you have any vision of what it could change to? Are there any elements of a Green New Deal, or even a Green American Dream that could come into play?

Since we tend to compare ourselves to others, if in at least some communities, the idea that it's not cool to just want stuff takes off, then can this attitude become infectious for the rest of the country?

I see small things changing in small pockets of the U.S. Like my sister lives in Seattle and I was talking about green cleaning companies and she said "Who doesn't clean with green cleaning products these days?". In her community, at least (not necessarily all of Seattle), that is what she sees so it's become her norm. A small example.

Thanks. I was wondering about the files issue. And I just added some contact information.

Do you have any experience building furniture or is this going to be a learning experience? I wonder about how the growing DIY movement (at least online) is affecting our happiness. Is there something innately satisfying about making things?

I would agree that part of the enjoyment of life is continually striving, or growing. For me, that exploration is less physical and more intellectual/emotional. And maybe I'm biased, or hitting this point too hard, but I would again argue that those who search for a better place to live in physically (a bigger house, etc) will be less satisfied than one who strives for a better place emotionally/intellectually.

Wow. Your life sounds like something out of a movie. Living near the sea, a volcano... finally living near the woman you love (despite sacrifices) and near your son.

It definitely sounds as if you have your priorities in a good place: the people in your life, working on only work you enjoy, creating environments that make you happy (physically and otherwise). Do you think you are common amongst the people you know? How much are you a product of your environment? i.e. Your family, Sicily (I assume this is home), programming community (I assume that's what you do for Redis).

Actually, given how colorful your life sounds, I would love to see more on video. Would you be interested in a Skype chat, and even shooting a bit of video with some sort of handicam, or whatever you have (still photos even)? It doesn't have to be now, but something to consider.

I'm glad you enjoy the exercise. I find it impossible to be happy without thinking about it once in awhile.

I like the idea of walking away from your laptop for a couple days every week. I do that for most of Sunday when we visit my in-laws, but if it weren't for that day I'd find it difficult to avoid.

I wonder if having a dream of positive change more likely implies wanting a laptop to a large home. Do you think your goal of changing the world is shared by your peers? Do you see things changing in that respect, a move (however slight) from materialistic goals to a make-your-mark attitude?

You paint a nice picture. How much of this have you accomplished? Obviously, you can't answer re: the last point, but, do you live near the sea? Is eating well a bigger focus for you than working long hours? Etc.

Nice goal. It definitely sounds like an alternative American Dream to that of the Gatsby variety. Wealth and things are obviously not your end goal, but what about personal lifestyle choices: is stuff important? or any particular stuff, things that you own? (your home, a big home, etc).

Passive solar used to be the way everyone built... at least before way back with the Ancient Greeks and Chinese. But when we stopped relying on sun for energy, most of us stopped building this way.

I would guess passive solar gained popularity in the seventies due to more attention to energy conservation (oil crisis and all) and then when oil got cheap again, it wasn't so trendy. Hope that's not that case now.

Though cheap oil and global warming aside, I'd still prefer to live in a home heated by the sun and cooled by the earth. AC gives me a headache and I much prefer the feel of sun through a window than the blast of central heating.

For some parents not enrolling their kids in every possible class (from sports to arts) or encouraging their participation in debate or math clubs is somehow failing to prepare them adequately for a competitive college/job market. The idea that actually stepping back and saying "just one extracurricular per year" might actually be better for your kids is controversial for "helicopter parents".

As for Kipling, I would assume the reference I took (from another critic) was referring to either Kipling's more adult books or reading the Jungle Book to very young kids. As a parent of a 2-year-old who is tired of reading and re-reading most of the very simple books in the young kids' section of the library (I agree with gvb regarding many modern storybooks), I'm inspired to pull out something more mature that I might enjoy more as well.

This is the first piece I edited after being criticized on HN for being too political with my small house story. I wanted this to be less political and more personal.

My impression from doing the story is that they want to use the farm for experiments in living. Trying out solar, wind, raising animals, growing with intensive raised beds, etc. But I don't think they expect to be completely self-sufficient, in the short-term anyway. I think they're fairly realistic that their entire community isn't set up that way at this point (good points about what it takes to supply solar, wind, etc). Tim, the farm's owner, is also trying experiments in more sustainable city living (for more, I did a video on his small town green highrise going up in Chapel Hill, NC http://faircompanies.com/videos/view/a-small-town-green-high...

Vancouver's CK Choi building has public composting toilets.. it's pretty modern looking. Probably depends on how they're designed.

I think he was talking about how he has to carry water up to the loft in order to use his shower. It's a gravity system with just a jug of water above the shower which falls when he opens the tap (or it looks like just a PVC tube in his case). Though since he's in a trailer I'd guess he's not hooked up to the sewage system.. would guess it's similar to an RV in that sense. But he never discussed that in the interview.

You're right. I wasn't condemning all consumption, but overconsumption (what has made is so that if everyone in the world lived like Americans we'd need 5 planets to support us). In the past couple of years, I've started to think more about how most consumption means some sort of depletion of resources and most often they're resources we don't have enough of. I also learned the term "embodied energy" and started taking about what it takes just to make/transport stuff. Add to that thinking about CO2 emissions (also a relatively new concept for me.. past few years) and it all makes me want to try to do what I can to preserve the planet (and its resources) for kids/grandkids.

I'd agree that Jay does a good job of presentation, but I also think the points of living smaller and with less stuff are important. Just read a report that personal spending is 70% of GDP in the US. So given that smaller homes make it tough to buy more it should help cut consumption.

We've done a story on living in an RV where the owner talks about how living small cuts down on energy consumption: http://faircompanies.com/videos/view/living-small-when-home-...