Then you're an actual introvert! Nothing wrong with that! I should have been clearer: There are introverts and then the aforementioned two kinds of people hiding behind the label.
37 karma · joined September 17, 2016
This extrovert/introvert label is used in ways it shouldn't. Two kinds of people hide behind being an introvert: assholes and people afraid of other people, often a mixture of both. Both groups alienate people with their behaviors and thus are lonely, sometimes angry about it, which worsens both traits. They don't want to be, making contact with people exhausting. Instead of addressing the real problem, they get isolated even more or, like you, externalize getting happiness, which I bet Heroin is very good at consistently delivering.
Again: these traits are not fixed. If you think of yourself as unlikable, you will be. If you think people are all stupid (way to generalize), you will alienate other people. If you think other people are dangerous, which you might have had to learn early in your life, you will behave in a way that other people don't find pleasurable and won't choose to be around you. It's painful to think about, so people just say they're introverted.
You can accept that & change, or you can stay where you are. I myself decided to stay in this social coma for 20 years, really angry about it too, being even harder on myself & others. Didn't help. Now people (voluntarily!) call me.
1. Have good food, that sells. Nothing else matters. No big up front investments. Have a killer product, which you make in your home kitchen if you have to. I thought Americans knew this, with their food trucks and shared kitchens.
I see this all the time. People thinking about how to name their company, how the logo looks, or in this case which forks to use. These things matter, but only in the long run, when you're able to sell your product successfully already.
Access to money and people like the author make this difficult, you aren't forced to survive.
A restaurant near me has started without a name, no interior decoration and a less than good but not too bad location. After six months they had a line out the door, every night. After a year they had a name. After two years they renovated, but just a little bit. Now it's 5 years later, it looks fancy, they have a logo and it's nicely renovated. But they started with the product.
I think it's a good idea to do everything in reverse, especially when we are worried how we are perceived. We see finished, well working things and think we need to emulate everything they are doing, including the expensive business cards, when it's really the other way around. Product first, being forced to survive, the details come later. Makes for a much more relaxing atmosphere as well, with much less meetings that go nowhere.