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Comment by tsally | Hacker News Reader

Wow I'm hearing tons of complicated ways to avoid direct conversation. If you pay several thousand dollars for a machine, I'm pretty sure you get to decide to gets to do what with it. If it is your companies screen, you are still responsible for it, so the same thing applies. Next time it happens, just politely explain how you feel. There's no need for the passive aggressive solutions that a few people are suggesting.

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Yes, exactly. "Please don't touch my screen" has always worked fine for me. Especially if you get it out quick before they actually make contact, always say it politely, and make sure that you repeat the warning 100% of the time that there's a finger heading towards the screen.

    "Hey, you see that thing right--"
    "Please don't touch my screen."
    "I didn't touch it, though."
    "I know.  Thank you.  Please keep it that way."
    "Ok... anyway, the thing right here--" (pointing)
    "Please don't touch my screen."
    (mildly annoyed, steps back a foot) "So, the thing under the red bit there..."

The downside is that the obsessive screen smudger will be a little bit annoyed at you. Which, in my opinion, is better that you being annoyed at them. At least it's in the open. And, there's a good chance that they won't come bother you f2f as much, unless it's really necessary, which is a bonus.

If that doesn't work, just work remotely.

And, seriously, what kind of unevolved cretin can't communicate without pointing anyway? It's embarrassing. If you have to point, point with the mouse, or learn to use Skitch.

We clearly have very different ideas of what "polite" means. Your little exchange makes you come off sounding like a prized asshole.

And, seriously, what kind of unevolved cretin can't communicate without pointing anyway?

This is ridiculous. Pointing serves a very useful purpose in communication, and is often far more efficient than verbal cues. Have you really never pointed at anything while trying to communicate something to someone? If not, you should really try it. You'll be amazed at how easy and effective it is :)

Yes, I know what pointing accomplishes. But it's also very effective to communicate without marking up my screen in greasy finger prints. Everyone — everyone — who thinks that they can point at something on a screen effectively without touching it, is just fooling themselves. You will touch my screen if you point at it, and I'll know you touched it, because your fingerprint will be there, painted in disgusting finger grease distorting my beautiful pixels. Maybe not every time, but most of the time.

There is a place for prized asshole behavior. Frankly, touching someone's screen when it clearly bothers them is pretty damn rude, imo. If the only way to get them to stop is to make them uncomfortable doing it in your presence, that seems fair to me.

I'd react roughly the same way if someone rubbed their genitals on my screen while I was using it. It's that offensive to me. (Actually, I wouldn't mind the genitals quite as much. They're probably cleaner.)

There is a place for prized asshole behavior.

Probably not. There's always a better way to say something. Acting like an asshole is just a fallback for not understanding how to effectively communicate. I'd be annoyed at a coworker if I had the dialogue you posted above with him/her.

I'd react roughly the same way if someone rubbed their genitals on my screen while I was using it. It's that offensive to me.

Really? You'd politely say "Please don't touch my screen with your genitals"?

I don't know you or anything, but it seems like life is too short to get this worked up over something so trivial.

I just pointed at your screen, did I leave a mark ?

The goal of the better suggestions isn't to avoid confrontation, but to remind that there are ways to make requests that are more and less likely to get you what you want. Accusatory, sarcastic, and snide tones are well into the "less likely to get you what want", zone; making yourself out to be the one with the problem, and framing the request as asking a co-worker to do you a small favor is much more likely to have a positive result.

The reason people have all these passive aggressive solutions is because they feel kind of embarrassed that they have such an attachment to an inanimate object. It's like telling someone not to touch your baby.

I know most people will claim that it's just the cost of the item, but in reality I think it's that they're addicted to that little window into the machine. I know I am.

It's more likely because you don't want to have to clean fingerprints off the screen.

Wow, this is proof that this place is turning into Digg more and more every day.

I think the passive aggressive solutions exist because most people have terrible communication skills. It seems like it all comes from the assumption that if you actually disagree with someone or want them to behave a different way around you, you must be a huge asshole that no one will respect. If we communicate indirectly, we get to claim the higher moral ground because we were merely "passive" while the other person OBVIOUSLY didn't get our EXTREMELY OBVIOUS indirect message and therefore must be not only an asshole but an idiot.

Now the other guy is the rude idiot. Problem solved!

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