I'm in therapy. I'm on meds.

I'm "doing the work" but it takes fucking forever. How are you supposed to survive for the years it takes for society to begin to accept you? I don't have time I am getting older and less appealing every day. I am running out of time... or I have ALREADY run out of time and I am gripped in the terror of panic because it's too late and it's already lost / gone

You can't medicate your way out of a situation.

You can't take a pill that changes your job.

There is no way out.