I feel this in my own life, as an European grown up mostly around my mother, sister, and younger female cousins. My father lived abroad for long periods of time.
Women nowadays keep assuming I'm gay due to my mannerisms.
Women nowadays keep assuming I'm gay due to my mannerisms.
How did the mom not realize that her kid was shaving his legs and wearing mascara? I guess it would be one thing if the kid was doing it with intention, but he clearly wasn't. How did she never talk to her son about that?
And it's the unusual which make it to sites like these. ("When dog bites man, it's not news. But when man bites dog, now that is news!")
[1] Or it could be the mother didn't know how to bring it up, or thought she was being supportive of her son's choices.
Could other 11 year olds spot a boy using mascara, a differing from one with thick eyelashes?
Or tell that someone is shaving his legs when there isn't yet even peach fuzz on his chin?
I couldn't, but I'm pretty oblivious to such things.
I think they would just default to making fun of him for wearing mascara. (source: i have thick eyelashes)
> Or tell that someone is shaving his legs when there isn't yet even peach fuzz on his chin?
definitely not.
> I couldn't, but I'm pretty oblivious to such things.
as am i, but i've learned that many other people are oddly skilled at picking up on these things.
i think the next step is recognizing that this is a problem that needs to be confronted for both men and women. "toxic masculinity" among men is frequently nowadays talked about and criticized, but i think women are given a bit too much of a pass in holding pretty shitty gendered/trad expectations of men.
Even now, I'm more comfortable if I look at least a little unkempt, as if I work outside with my hands or something. I consciously know it's dumb, but my wife expresses preferences for that unkemptness in me as well.
An amputee might find strength and toughness in learning to adapt to being without an arm. That doesn't mean we go around encouraging people to cut off their arms. I suspect most amputees would rather not have to have that experience in the first place.
Quoting "Bullying: A Module for Teachers" at https://www.apa.org/education-career/k12/bullying under "Myths about bullying"
> Many beliefs about school bullying are not supported by current research. These are among the most common myths that even some teachers have been known to endorse: ...
> Being a victim builds character.
> Another misconception is that bullying is a normal part of the childhood and adolescence experience, and that surviving peer harassment builds character. In contrast to this view, research findings clearly show that being bullied increases the vulnerabilities of bullied children. For example, we know that children who are passive and socially withdrawn are at a heightened risk of getting bullied and these children become even more withdrawn after incidents of harassment (Schwartz, Dodge, & Coie, 1993).
How many other people suffered, in being part of the same bullying environment from which you drew your character?
I mean, growing up in the US I heard about how French women didn't shave their armpits. As an Italian example, Sophia Loren - https://fineartamerica.com/featured/sophia-loren-on-a-poster... . So it's not like these have been universal Western practices even in my lifetime.