I don't know about "Penetration" vs "kill" - I would agree that kill is objectively more offensive, but as an industry we've got an issue with sexual harassment not violence - so I don't know if kill really applies in it's offensive meaning here.
All I know is that the jokes around "Penetration" need to die. In this particular scenario that specific "Do you like being penetrated line" was practically set up as a response to the shirt - it's a bad shirt to wear to a professional event. If we can just tone down the marketing I think it'll continue to die off as decorum is normalized.
"I'm sorry, Fry, but astronomers renamed Uranus in 2620 to end that stupid joke once and for all."