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Comment by siculars | Hacker News Reader

Go to a bar or other public venue. Pick up chicks. Or guys. Whatever gets you going. Rinse, repeat.

This is not negotiating (unless you're paying for the person you're taking home). I can't remember ever negotiating to get someone to go on a date with me. There is definitely a two-way process/interaction going on, but I don't think it's anything like negotiation.

I would argue that there are a lot of the same things going on, just abstracted away several times through layers of misdirection and hidden meanings.

Different for different people I guess.

I could go work at an amazing company and they could be really happy to have me, but we'll never both have the same idea about an ideal outcome. I'll want more and they'll want to give me less. I think that's more what negotiating is about, i.e. giving up something you don't want to so you can come to an agreement.

If you're chasing guys/girls, you're really just working towards a common goal with pretty much the same desired outcome (whether it be coffee, dinner, sex, whatever). One party is rarely giving something up in order to make the other person want to come to an agreement. That usually comes later in the relationship ;-)

You seem to think that a negotiation requires an exchange of money. Nothing could be further from the truth. The dictionary that comes with mac dashboard defines negotiation thusly:

   negotiation |nəˌgō sh ēˈā sh ən|
   noun (also negotiations)
   discussion aimed at reaching an agreement

There is very little difference in negotiating a salary and negotiating a romantic relationship at the end of the day. You try to reach an amicable agreement that both parties can live with. The reason I recommended a bar/public venue is that you can get way more practice there than waiting for your next salary offer.

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