Childhood trauma has been a better measurement for understanding people who claim or chase ‘huge success‘ in my experience - and this includes myself. From what I see, the image of ‘success’ that is expected or hoped for by many today has little to do with joy and pleasure, and more to do dominating others. From what I’ve experienced I’ve seen that if one has unresolved childhood trauma‘s and PTSD, one is more likely to act out of revenge, or to enjoy violence (Marshall Rosenberg writes about this: he believes that when our needs are unmet - we can sometimes start to ‘enjoy‘ violence more).

I’ve now been facing my childhood trauma and addressing it, as well as growing a more compassionate self, and reflecting on this is interesting, because a part of me of course still yearns for an extravagant hero journey, yet I’m not finding myself wishing or hoping for this big idea of success, I think because my relationships have become a lot better and a lot easier, and my experience of life lighter and more playful. Also I have individuen and I am more authentic now. Less perfectionistic and more forgiving. It’s a relief.

I think I no longer aim for the same type of success as before.