This must be one of the greatest examples of the Dunning-Kruger effect [1] in action that I've seen on HN in recent times. Pretty much everything in your analysis is misinformed, and you even explicitly mention in an aside that you are "not too familiar with Tor", but still state everything with an almost absolute certainty.

You could have made the argument that allowing a single bridge makes it a bit easier to do traffic analysis attacks against users (instead of having to do DPI), but the ISP interception model is pretty much what Tor tries to protect you against, as long as that ISP isn't also (aided by) a global passive adversary.

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect