Hacker News Reader

Comment by stared | Hacker News Reader

In that sense I am a meta-psychopath, as I consciously consider that people who are friends with their exes are better. Why? Because if people aren't, it means at least one of the following:

- they choose their mates randomly or based on superficial things (so there is no need to stay in touch after a breakup),

- they are horrible people (so the other side does not want to stay in touch),

- they keep finding horrible people,

- they need a scapegoat or are vengeful,

- they are overly emotional and cannot get over a breakup,

- they are overly envious.

(I am in good relations with most of my ex-girlfriends.)

View on HN

Actually, in that sense you are a psychopath, since you are in good relations with most of your ex-girlfriends.

Also, how is not keeping an ex in your life a sign that you're overly emotional and can't get over a breakup? Keeping an ex out of your life is you getting over the breakup. Also, you can't be envious of someone you keep out of your life. More could be said about the rest of your list, which is just bad to be honest.

Or just an enabler? :-)

I see it as both manipulative (of the ex) and disrespectful to the current. It's one thing to be Facebook Friends, it's another to bring the competition into the dining room. It took me a while to pick up on this. When Harry Met Sally [0] wasn't 100% true, but it's true enough to be a general guide.

[0] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8kpYm-6nuE

wait, there's a competition? If anyone feels like competing with their parthner ex on the dinning room isn't that lack of self confidence instead of disrespect from the parthner?

Competition?

Who on earth is in a competition???

(I find that to be solidly awful way to view relationships.)

It would be nice to say that people are above emotions in life, but my current will always view my exs as competition. It's just the way it is, and I accept it.

If you think yours doesn't, you may have an enlightened girlfriend, or she may just not be sharing her beliefs.

Would you be 100% ok if your current had an ex who kept showing up?

Agreed. A girlfriend is first and mostly a friend, otherwise it's superficial.

The capacity of meta-psychopaths to justify their psychotic tendencies is just astounding. :)

Reply on news.ycombinator.com