yaway

Paddy's Dollars https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyxxE1AcUSM

infinite jest by david foster wallace - the author is himself the embodiment of middle/upper class existential angst and it seeps into all of his work

will also second revolutionary road by yates, and the swimmer by cheever, although they are a bit dated at this point

there are too many digressions and obscure inside-references in this essay, but this cuts to the heart of the matter:

"[Premium mediocre] is an economic and cultural rearguard action by young people launched into life from the old middle class, but not quite equipped to stay there, and trying to engineer a face-saving soft landing…somewhere."

i'm 24 and while i can see the humor and hyperbole in this article, its also a pretty astute description of the disenchantment many of my bicoastal "elite" friends from middle/upper-middle class families feel.

timely too. one of my friends texted me this morning: "[my large corporate employer] laid off 90% of its sales force yesterday...survived another day in corporate America"

the worst side effect for me is feeling like i am stupid and naive for trying to do things the "right" way - the meritocratic, socially conscious, altruistic way - when it seems like these are values that do not achieve the right outcomes anymore. should just shut up and get mine.

overall i feel my generation, or at least my social strata, will mature to be colder, harder and more distant than our predecessors. all it will take to cement this transformation is another recession