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troubledbrotheron [dead]

Thanks for your concern. jacquesm's comment did make me pause and think, but I tend to not get carried away when thinking about taking responsibility. I have seen my dad take responsibility for a lot of his relatives' shortcomings all his life; all parties involved end up being miserable. So that history makes me a bit wary of compromising on my life for someone else.

But, I really do want to help my brother, which may involve some compromises.

troubledbrotheron [dead]

Yes, as I mentioned in my post, I do realize that. My intention of posting here is to find out what kind of specialist help others may have gotten. I'm sorry about the irrelevance of the topic on this forum, but I think there are a lot of highly rational and intelligent people here, who tend to give good advice even on personal issues.

troubledbrotheron [dead]

Thanks, those are some thoughtful points.

Is this the book you recommend? - http://www.amazon.com/Truth-About-Addiction-Recovery-Stanton...

troubledbrotheron [dead]

Do you have more brothers? If you do can they be of assistance somehow? Does your brother look up to you, see you as a role model? Does he have good friends?

I don't have more brothers, but there are a few family members around my brother to help and support him. However, the generation gap is a problem. He does relate best to me and look up to me as a bit of a role model. He doesn't really have any good friends, not any that he hangs out with.

Sorry to hear about your dad and glad that you took a positive lesson from his life.

Thanks for your help.

troubledbrotheron [dead]

You're spot on there.

He's a lawyer. In fact, he applied for a masters degree here and got into a couple of decent universities. But we were scared that his drinking would go completely out of control here, where drinking (especially binge drinking) is a lot more common than in India. So, he deferred his plans to come here and work for a while in India.

But perhaps a change of scene is really what he needs.

troubledbrotheron [dead]

I have thought of doing that, but given that he seemed to be recovering recently and also just started working, I put it off. Also, I'm not sure how much a short visit would help.

I'm sorry to hear about your family; thanks for your help.

troubledbrotheron [dead]

I can try and visit him more often, but I've just started a startup. Perhaps it's time to revise my priorities.

Have you considered that he's drinking because it brings out the brother in you?

I've never looked at it that way, but if that's the case, me being near him may help.