throwawayrock

I was studying a degree I hated (a field of eng I had chosen only because the scholarship afforded me to study), I was failing more classes than I passed (I hated this the most as I was previously an overachiever), I was losing relationships, I had nothing to look forward to in my opinion. I thought about seriously ending it 3-5 times a day, often visiting the place I planned to do it.

It cumulated in a breakdown in 3rd year. A very understanding friend realised what I was going through and printed off every course our university offered. She highlighted the ones she thought I would be amazing at, and told me to just study what I enjoyed and the rest would follow. I chose computer science. I was very poor for a while, but I started making websites for fun, went well at uni and had more confidence in myself. Got an internship with a great startup and learned so much.

Cut to now, I'm a year out of uni and am a senior dev at a larger company, in a great relationship and really enjoy my life. I still work really hard not to fall into old destructive patterns, but I've definitely come a long way. Coming from rock bottom really shows you what you can shed, what really matters in life (doing what you love and loving the people in your life).