This is exactly how I feel. I have no I mention of suicide, but I feel it looming over me.
The biggest thing that has stopped me has been not wanting my family to have to deal with my suicide. I've slowly distanced myself from my family over the past few years, and figure at some point I'll just 'go away' in such a manner that nobody knows what happened. I guess I'm a bit selfish, but I really don't care anymore.