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You comment is a basically a very good example of a strawman argument.

Counterargument that destroys your entire premise: C's revisions( note that revisions are not flavors or separate languages ) don't fork.

I was expecting something interesting. Generic selection is built into the language:

http://en.cppreference.com/w/c/language/generic

Can form original thought.

He is a paying customer... wow unbelievable.

Why can the police/FBI help in this case, given all the threads and demands? Were they contacted and informed of the situation?

Hopefully the next step is going to be switching from Google to a different provider.

Why is it acceptable to do this on plants but not on animals?

The converter is actually what I would really like to have. I hate parsing. And fixing it when it breaks. It doesn't matter if the code is ugly. You are trying to parse crappy websites after all. Consider sharing.

I'm a C programmer, and I'm considering trying C++ in the future. Can you elaborate?

Would you mind sharing the program?