In the US.
> What edge does PHP still have compared to other languages?
Horizontal scaling due to the nothing shared architecture: need more perfs? Add a server. Which is an exact match with Kubernetes (replace server with replica). But usually your performance problem is not the executing code but the database.
> PHP needs to get rid of having Nginx/FastCGI as a requirement. Let PHP-FPM speak HTTP directly. If you want to terminate TLS via Nginx, it becomes a choice, not a requirement.
FrankenPHP is this.
Seems like your beef is not with php itself (aside from the compiling part) but the Laravel ecosystem. You may want to check Symfony and its ecosystem and what is being cooked outside Laravel.