It's probably more idiomatic to use org-mode (not that it makes a difference really). Here's a random example I found: https://github.com/larstvei/dot-emacs
You could use cool-retro-term[0] for the visual side, but that doesn't support baud rate emulation either. Maybe you could pipe things through `pv` with the `-L` flag to limit speed?
NoScript includes a toggle to disable exactly this behaviour (meta tags within noscript tags). meta refreshes in general are pretty annoying as a user though
I've got 'bind Space:magic-space' in my .bashrc, which performs history expansion after you hit space, maybe that partially helps. I guess there's friction if the expanded command isn't the one you want, which the interactive methods are better at dealing with.
According to the page they're aiming for 9 hours battery life with location tracking and offline music. Although it doesn't seem waterproof so a triathlon might be out of the question.
I know that both Miniflux (previously used) and TinyTinyRSS (currently using) work with Reeder (via the Fever API). It's a bit annoying that the Fever API doesn't provide any way to add feeds though, so you'll need to do that in-browser.