Without medication, getting my brain to do what I want it to is like bushing a bolder up a hill. With the proper medication, I gain a lot of control over my concentration.
Sometimes I could do them faster than others. It depends.
I also believe my problem could be discipline.
I usually work during the night, sometimes in the morning. I choose the night because it's less distraction, but then I distract myself with reddit or IRC, and I get little done.
I remember having some learning difficulties when I was at school, not sure if that was related to attention problems, and I had to go to a special school for that.
These days I don't have much problem with learning, but with attention/productivity.
Few things:
1) Sleep on a regular schedule. Set a "go to bed" alarm. Stick to it. Makes a huge difference.
2) Exercise, even if just taking brisk walks. It directly affects concentration/attention for the rest of your day. That's fairly well-supported by studies/literature.
3) Eat right. Be careful about caffeine and sugar, as the crashes will probably hit you harder than most.
4) In general, get on a schedule. Rhythm is the key.
As far as productivity:
1) Underpromise, overdeliver. This is hugely important. If you know you're not as efficient as you want to be you have to stop telling people what they want to hear and start telling them something more accurate. Even if you were ideal, we usually underestimate software tasks.
2) Look into Pomodoro or some other interval work rhythm method. It makes it OK to take breaks by regimenting them some.
3) Use a Todo list. Try to get one impactful thing (or chunk of thing) done each day at a minimum. Look up "Big Rocks" or "Zen to Done" on Google for some good tips there.
3) Find a coach. There are ADHD and productivity coaches out there that specialize in this stuff.
4) If you can't find a coach, at least find a mentor.
5) Go talk to a doctor. You sound like you have issues to actually address. If yours are like mine, meds help. You probably also need to learn some good habits though--there's no magic solution.
You also need to work on making yourself happier and regaining your own trust back. You're way too down on yourself, and you've actually written yourself off as inherently problematic. Objectivity is good, but it can also be how you get defeated before you start.
You actually sound like I did when I didn't feel like I could even be accountable to myself. Your first challenge is to get a grip on how you work and make yourself OK with it while you get better. Everyone's different, and the important thing is to accommodate yourself effectively, not to be perfect. But first, start making yourself happy. One accomplishment a day is a good step towards that.
Last thing:
I listed a lot of stuff. Don't try to do it all at once. You'll flop hard. But start working towards it.
Since you're having work issues in particular, I'd look at sleep, Todo lists, and Pomodoro as some of the first things you try.
A few other suggestions:
- Take a bit of a break from finding work, to let yourself clear your head and destress.
- You could possibly look into getting some other type of work , and code in your spare time. Perhaps you're just getting bored and burned out with working on boring projects, and working on your own stuff might make you more productive and creative.
What do you mean with this exactly?
I mean that caffeine and sugar both have an energy upswing and an energy downswing associated with them. If you're already having issues with motivation, maybe even with lethargy, the downswing will potentially take you from minimally functional to useless. Any sleep or nutrition problems will also exaggerate this effect.