So now being able to take vacations (even if you're in financially good shape) is off limits? I'm not justifying anything that the lady in question did... but I think a 30k car and one vacation a year is reasonable on a 120k salary. Sounds like two people, yourself included, have said no- that is not acceptable (and that makes you entitled for thinking so). I know some extremely thrifty (or smart if you will) people that don't place any value on emotional experiences that might "recharge your batteries" that would argue it's a waste (even if you have more than enough money). Looks like you're one of them.
When you lose your job, you're right- the "means" change and you need to re-evaluate things. I'm not questioning that. I was questioning how is a 30k car out of the means of $120k/year person, especially if they can buy it in cash.