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Right. My grandmother was tack-sharp into her 90s, and her daily diet was pretty much vodka martinis, steak and eggs, ice cream and cigarettes. I'll just do that ...

Amazingly enough, that may actually be good for you. Why? Most likely, she didn't really care about the health aspects of it, had those in social events (the vodka martinis) and enjoyed more stress-free eating that folks nowadays.

I don't promote unhealthy eating, but between unhealthy eaten care free lifestyle or health obsessed, stressed everything gives you cancer lifestyle, I believe the former will be better.

The vast majority of the vodka martinis were consumed in her kitchen between 10am and 1pm, not at social events =)

You will be surprised, by this will lead you to the plant-based diet. See https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_Zone and http://www.bluezones.com/

The oldest living woman smoked daily into her late 90s.