I meant considered appropriate within their moral framework.

I wrote it to stress that it's often group behavior, with the enablers and supporters that go along with it, and that you shouldn't think about it in terms of the 'lone distraught person.'

Just to be clear: I would never, ever, wish to be associated in any manner with a person or organization that operates on such a moral framework.

That's a pretty meaningless distinction if it has no other consequences – it's essentially demoting this to the level of seriousness of wearing non-matching socks and the only people who benefit from this are the abusers.