Comment by Dylan16807 | Hacker News Reader

Comment by Dylan16807 | Hacker News Reader

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Are blaming statements inherently a problem? It seems quite intentional to imply that certain activities are negative. I see the second blaming statement in particular as a combination of harmless venting, and warning away anyone that would butt in to provide a shallow explanation that isn't backed by understanding.

Now back to the first statement, I'll go to an extreme to provide an example. I would feel contempt toward a person that prefers to sleep 23 hours of the day rather than spend some of that time on productive activities. It is their right to do so if they desire, but I would not be ashamed to judge such a behavior. Is there a downside to my blaming here?

As to meditation, it seems like the description of 'stop thinking' is misleading, which is the source of the confusion, and what leads to the blaming tone. But if I'm right about that, then no actual person is being blamed, only an accidental strawman. But that will take some clarification to figure out. So: when you 'stop thinking' how long does that state last, and how does it affect your thoughts afterward? Does it matter how long you spend in that state?

I believe the general idea is to allow choice in others. You don't have to agree with them, as that is your choice, but you should at least entertain their choice: hear them. Many things in our history were considered negative at first and were later adopted as the norm. I agree that venting is necessary, but understanding why you are venting is more important. Fears, interest, boredom, love. Those emotions drive us all, but few understand how they make us think.

There is no downside to your behavior in forming an opinion of another being. If someone is depressed, they have unresolved issues. If they choose this for themselves, well, that's their choice. If you perceive you can help them, it makes more sense you work on getting to the unresolved issues instead of telling them to do something they already know they shouldn't do - sleep 23 hours a day. Whether you want to dig into someone's nasty problems is up to you and your level of interest in the subject.

Yes, confusion frequently leads to blaming. I wasn't trying to indicate I was being blamed, and only used it as an example to prove a larger point: slowing or stopping your thinking opens you up to observation. Listening is a powerful thing.

I think there was a little confusion in there, I do practice meditation. It has been shown to provide valuable benefits.

What I suppose I didn't understand was why someone would want to achieve the cessation state, where they literally cease to exist. It sounds, simply from a clinical standpoint, like some kind of adverse symptom or effect on the brain being misinterpreted as a stage of something spiritual.

I can certainly see the meaning it might have to those who believe it's something more. But for those who don't hold these beliefs, it seems rather pointless. I guess the answer to my "blaming statement" would be "those who are spiritual and believe it is good would want to". To each their own, and while I don't share these beliefs, I needn't be so blunt when expressing differing opinions, I was out of line.

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