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Comment by jacquesm | Hacker News Reader

I find that memory is strange, not 'bad' or 'good'. In general it will remember stuff for a while unless you concentrate hard. Bad stuff might get 'forgotten' a little quicker than good stuff, or the reverse.

Stuff that you really want to remember sometimes gets lost for no apparent reason.

I used to be able to remember just about everything that I wanted but lately (now almost 45) that is getting noticeably harder.

Traumatic stuff is in a class of its own. Some people will never be able to get away from it, others have it suppressed to the point where it might as well not have happened.

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Have to be anonymous for this as it is a little too personal for comfort.

My earliest memories are from probably extremely traumatic situations: Finding my mother's boyfriend dead from a heroin overdose in his bed (both were addicts) and watching an ambulance crew carry him out. Eating raw pasta when our mother had left us alone in the house for days. Being taken from our house by social workers (I remember parts of the drive from there in vivid detail). I was four or five at that time.

The funny thing is I don't remember how I felt at the time, but the scenes are etched in my memory.

Oh well, make of it what you want, it just came back to me when reading your post :)

Oh yeah, I didn't go to my high school re-union either. I liked the people I went to class with at the time, but the memories from the time are painful so I really have no desire to stir them.

At the same time I go to my college re-union every year, which is associated with a time when life became stable.

I don't really know what to say to that other than that I'm really happy to see you on the 'other side' of that and alive and apparently well. I thought I had had it pretty rough at some times in my past, you make me feel like I had a very easy childhood.

Wow.

My only response to you would be that you should take immense pride in the fact that you beat the odds. (Just by posting here I'm sure you have)

You've faced a challenge in life that would destroy most people, and you overcame it. I can only wish that I have the same determination as you.

Thanks, seriously. I don't know that I am extraordinarily resilient or if the circumstances just sound worse to an outsider than they really were. In either case I don't have to think too hard to come up with somebody who has it worse than me, which is always a sobering thought.

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