I understand what you are trying to say, but I think mercer (in a sibling thread) has it right. A lot of us are in environments that feel like they are designed to keep us separated after we enter our professional life. This is particularly true for people that have moved by themselves to a different state or country and basically need to build a social circle from scratch. And this gets more difficult as you grow older.

I live in a central European country for four years now and I find it extremely hard to meet new people even for a superficial friendship.

- I have very few coworkers, but even if I didn’t, people tend to keep professional and private life very separate here. Some actually think they have “enough” friends and you might never get through to them no matter how much you try.

- In my home country I would usually meet people through friends of friends, but here my friends will rarely bring anyone else of their circle when we go out (even when asked).

- Meetups are also a big failure for me. Most of the time they involve huge groups that are very impersonal. They involve people that are here for a month up to people that have been here for 20-30 years and have their own cliques within the meetup. The first year I kept going to the same meetup and kept introducing myself to the same (more or less) people and held the same discussion over and over. Each meetup was as if I was there for the first time and needless to say, I didn’t make a single friend from that. Even in the smaller ones, it seems that most participate either to spend a night away from their spouse/“real” friends or just for the activity.

- Going up to talk to random strangers is also not very common here, but even if it was, it is unfortunately impossible for me. I feel incredibly self-conscious and uncomfortable. I tried it when I was in the US where people are more open and I honestly hated myself. I doubt PUA literature would help.

Anyway, I don't want to be too negative and I also have me to blame for the situation. What I wanted to highlight is that it also depends on the cultural environment and the particular circumstances. To me, it is quite indicative that we have dating websites and meetups and social web sites and whatnot but we are generally more lonely.