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Comment by rickenharp | Hacker News Reader

But sometimes (at least in my case) it seems that even if you put in all that effort, most of it just vanishes into some kind of void. You try to stay in touch with people, but no matter what you do, they keep drifting away. Which then leads to thinking "Why even bother putting in the energy, if I'm the only one trying".

It's a vicious cycle.

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Where do you live?

I found living in the northeast, USA -- so many were so focused on things they were told to do: Get education, work hard to start your career... that friendship building was not part of the equation.

Very different after I moved to Myrtle Beach, SC last year. 'Southern Hospitality' also helps: Its infectious. And the fact there are so many transplants from the North that everyone is looking to make new friends.

I live in Germany. And beeing a freelance developer, I get to hop around the country quite a bit, switching cities every few months.

What I find interesting is, that I have less of this feeling when I'm in the south here as well (Bavaria). It's easier to connect there. There must be something about the south.

Here in Brazil, that is in the south hemisphere, people are nicer as you move north, toward the equator.

Or southmost state instead is famous for having some xenophobic people, separatist movements, and triggering a huge civil war in the past.my guess is that in colder environments people are very distrustful of newcomers because they are a new risk in a already risky environment

Could it be culture?

I used to know a girl (surname Britz) from Porto Alegre and her family was of German descent and seemed like she had no Brazilian features from what I could see.

When I see pictures and video of people in Rio it's like different country.

Brazil is such a big and diverse country that any state seems like a different country. We have influence from Portugal, Holland [1], France, Germany, Italy, Africa, Japan and many other places. Some would argue that there's no such thing as a "Brazilian feature". That's one of the reasons I always have trouble filling the "race" form when I travel.

[1] The Dutch actually invaded Brazil for a few years: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dutch_Brazil

I think that's a good observation. People from Northern Europe (Sweden, Norway e.a.) are also known to be "colder" and more reserved than people in the Mediterranean region.

People in the north of England are said to be warmer and friendlier than those in the south. The north was mostly industrial and rural whilst the south has London's financial district and the Home Counties where the "posh" live. I say was because its a lot more homogenized now and there's less industry.

I think any general north-south variation would have to be over large areas (Brazil, Europe, the US). England is tiny--of course north-south differences are going to be dictated by local factors.

You'd be surprised. It may be a small country but if us highly populated and also has a rich long history

Weird. I've lived along the SC coast (Charleston & Hilton Head) my entire life and I have never really understood the "Southern Hospitality" term. I suppose living in the most affluent areas of the state could have something to do with it?

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