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Comment by wellboy | Hacker News Reader

He's not looking down on anyone or comparing himself with people who are disabled, he's looking at people who have the same responsibilites as him, but rather go for short term gratification than for creating their own freedom.

Growing up doesn't mean getting a job and saving money, but getting out there all by yourself and doing awesome shit. I wrote about that more in detail http://appreneur-diaries.com/its-time-to-grow-up-fuck-no

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This idea of "growing up" and following that prescription is also embodied in the misuse of the word 'maturity'. The word is used as a weapon to keep people from doing anything but 'what you're supposed to do'... anything else is 'childish'.

This most upsets me when I hear people apply it to themselves. They are being fun, thoughtful, creative and then say something like 'I wish I was being more mature...' NO! Don't! 'Mature' in that context means 'like everyone else who's been scared into compliance'

> "but rather go for short term gratification than for creating their own freedom."

How come starting a family is a "short" term gratification?

I've often seen the choice of having kids or getting married being used as a 'quick fix'. Usually for a failing relationship, insecurities or poor financial choices (benefits++). It's not always, but it can be.

Anyone having children to patch up a dodgy relationship is an idiot.

"Things aren't great between us are they?"

"No, what should we do?"

"I know let's try something that will leave us exhausted, financially worse off and with no time to ourselves, that will DEFINITELY help."

That's not what he's comparing himself to, he's not comparing himself to people with sick parents, disabilities or a family to take care of. He's comparing himself to young and educated indulging the life of well-earning bachelors buying shit they don't need.

If one has started a family and doesn't have one's own successful business yet, it's very likely to be forever stuck in the "job-limbo", because one does have responsibilities. Family is the most important thing.

Speaking for myself, I just couldn't start a family without having my own successful startup before, because otherwise I could never give myself and my children the freedom that I consider to be necessary to make a life worth living.

Good luck homy.

>"That's not what he's comparing himself to, he's not comparing himself to people with sick parents, disabilities or a family to take care of. He's comparing himself to young and educated indulging the life of well-earning bachelors buying shit they don't need."

I am not sure about that, he explicitly said that he is not interested in starting a family.

From the article: "I could have saved a bit less, and developed a taste for expensive shirts or exotic foreign holidays. Or I could have started a family. But I’m not interested in any of those things"

I can testify that unless you get off on sleep deprivation and clearing up other people's bodily waste there's little short term gratification in a family.

OMG intercourse and parental approval all in one???

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