Me too. I've also heard of one instance of postnatal depression where it was hoped that having a child would solve problems the parents were experiencing, both personally and in the relationship (I have no idea if this is a common cause of postnatal depression).
Assuming this is a general cause of victories turning to ashes, of trying to solve other problems with it... what to do? Should we disregard this feeling, and start a new project (have more kids/brain children)? Or try to find something that will be genuinely satisfying, and won't turn to ashes?
I don't know. But I think it might be more like this: 1. get the basics right 2. have fun.
1. basics
exercise, sleep, food
friendly, co-operative people, support/encouragement, help others and be helped
be factual (not emotional reasoning), discuss (see POVs), keep perspective
have a bigger philosophy: religion (Knuth and Brooks are religious), nature
2. fun
focus on the journey as enjoyable
don't see the result as a solution to *how you feel*
immediately go on to the next project
it's just for fun, not to redeem yourself or make everything alright
NB: I'm in no way commenting on your situation; I'm just replying to your comment to articulate these thoughts I've been having on this topic.