I could even use <strong style="font-weight: normal" /> if I wanted to emphasize something without making it bold. Because that has a functional purpose with screen readers, and isn't strictly a styling thing.
Em is for emphasis.
As for the older tags, they were deprecated in XHTML, but have been redeemed in HTML 5. <i> is used for elements that are traditionally set it italics but are neither emphasized nor citations. Often that will be foreign words (where one ought to use a lang attribute). Similarly <b> is used to indicate elements that are traditionally set in bold face, but which do not indicate importance (as headings or <strong> in running text would do). Both are better than the semantically-meaningless <span> tag, and vastly better than misusing the <em>, <cite> and <strong> tags for their presentation effects.