Very apt given I was just moaning (zombie?) to my colleague about this. The problem is how you get your pride back though - especially when management continually gets in the way.
Grow up, deal with it. Delivering bad news is part of many jobs, and programmers shouldn't expect to be exempt.
It's your choice whether or not you compromise your code. Sometimes you'll agree that it's worth it (shipping means $$$ the company desperately needs), sometimes saying no (because you know the consequences won't be worth it) will initially make people unhappy/disappointed/angry.
You can't please everyone all the time, and if you make pleasing your boss your highest priority, well, that's the price you pay.
While you and I know that refactoring is the right thing to do, the customer/manager isn't going to say "by all means, delay completion of the project in pursuit of improvements to parts of the system that only you have to deal with". They don't see/understand the code so naturally they don't care about its state.
[note] Obviously this is a blanket statement but it's been applicable to me and I'm sure others have experienced similar.
If the guy who made my lunch sandwich put as much pride and care into his product as we all want to, which lasts about as long as the average modern software application, it would cost $50 and I wouldn't want to buy it.
I think that's a false dichotomy. There's the $6 Subway option and the hypothetical $50 perfectionist option, but you can also get a really amazing sandwich near here for $9. They make something they're proud of, and it costs more than Subway, but it's worth it.
I agree that the typical Make-The-Boss-Go-Away Development Methodology is suboptimal. The only reason software engineers even come up with those silly estimates (which are pure bullshit, and lead to dashed expectations) is to make bosses go away so they can get back to work.
That pattern of behavior isn't what's best for companies.
On the other hand, this guy is a hired company cop that can turn off your income and fuck up your resume. You have no moral responsibility for anything but what works for you. If you have the rare good boss and a positive relationship, then deliver bad news early and be honest. If you have the typical extortionist thug ("serve my career goals or get out") then Make-The-Boss-Go-Away Development may not be the best strategy, but it's certainly morally acceptable.