Simple. If unconfigured, user birthdate should default to 1970-01-01
> "Internet-enabled device" means a smartphone, tablet, or personal laptop or desktop computer that provides cellular or wireless connectivity, is capable of connecting to the Internet, runs an operating system, and is capable of downloading and running applications.
Enumerate all network interfaces. Are any of them cellular or wireless? No? Then the law doesn’t apply.
[1] https://my.ilga.gov/documents/legislation/104/HB/PDF/10400HB...
It sounds like you could even get away with a wireless USB dongle, as it’s not part of the computer.
"Runs an operating system" is about the only one that has its box ticked >99% of the time.