'Help me but don't patronize' is a tall order without some real linguistic gymnastics.
Not at all. Just don't start by guessing what a disabled person's concerns are, or presume that an unsolicited suggestion is helpful. A respectful start is letting them know you will be responsive and let them lead the conversation.
https://www.xbox.com/en-US/accessories/controllers/xbox-adap...
Received high praise if I recall correctly.
Sure, we've all known engineers and product managers that don't consult the target audience, but don't assume that of everyone.