Except I'm no maker. I'm in a midlife crisis stuck between two opposing forces : the urge to make something of my life against the risk of putting too much time and efforts to ultimately fail plus the futility of it all. Virtually wealthy enough not to work a day anymore now with my current lifestyle (aside the risk this EU country's state defaults and falls).

Quite a perfect neutralization scheme in this "hunt for self-actualisation".

That's why the display of commitment shown in this thread hurts.