May I suggest that it may be your attitude about that piece of paper that is holding you back rather than the paper itself?

I'm confused as to why someone who freely admits they have been broke & unemployed for 15 years feels they are qualified to provide "advice", make critical judgement calls about others and brag about their awesomeness.

>> My actual accomplishments in the world of computing ... are the stuff of legends

We agree on the legends part

I don't have a college degree either. I am about 50. I have never been unemployed and have had high paying software dev jobs my entire adult life. Your claim that the lack of degree is the only thing holding you back is very much incorrect.

I suspect the problem is elsewhere and you are unwilling or uncomfortable to discuss it.

Protip: When you consistently present yourself as somebody with a massively inflated ego who will be a constant pain to interact with, nobody's going to hire you, skills or not.

> "going back to school" to learn what I already know pretty damn well already, given that I've been programming since I was 8

It's small consolation if sitting in a classroom is something you truly hate, but the guys who are programming pros before they go into a CS program are very often the ones who do really well and get the most out of it.

I left high school with average results and immediately got a job as a junior web developer, and I’m nothing special. I feel there must be more to this story… You don’t come off very well in your post, I imagine it could be the same in person and perhaps therein lies the issue?

So you’re freeloading dumpster food from a corporation. You show them buddy!

I created my first Linux from scratch when I was a freshman in college in a third world country (not India). Fast forward few years later, I now write Linux kernel code for a living. Not sure what you did wrong, bud, to end up miserable like this.