Comment by conductr | Hacker News Reader

Comment by conductr | Hacker News Reader

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The last one is key to my entire value system as a person. I have had some financial wins in life and try not to let it impact my day to day. I avoid, sometimes with great effort, flashy things (I’ve been tempted to by exotic cars as an example but have found if I just rent one for a day or two that urge goes away, it’s just a toy to me). I usually say I’m not materialistic, but I am at times, and what I strive to be is humble, modest, and invisible. I don’t want other people seeing me as flaunting wealth. It’s not who I want to be or how I want my kids to see me act.

That said, I do, like Buffet, live in a nice house. I’m not depriving myself. But it’s also very approachable by any successful employee of a company (maybe salary of a director or VP of any large company could afford it). It doesn’t represent what I could afford if I wanted to really get into the elite neighborhoods of my city. I don’t really enjoy people in those areas. They tend to always talk about money in one way or another (vacations, private schools, cars, houses, maids, nanny’s, etc). Nothing wrong with it I suppose, just not my jam and not how I want my children raised and not the people I want as my neighbors and peers. I’ve always been much more envious of those unsuspecting rich people that drive clunker cars or live in modest homes and mow their own lawns but then you find out they paid for 16 grand children to go to college or something random like that. That’s the kind of thing I’d rather be known for than the guy with the Ferrari or yacht (even if they weren’t mutually exclusive).

+1. I’ve always looked up to the hedge fund manager driving a civic and those who sneakily donate enormous amounts anonymously.

Life goals!

Love this take!

Modern society is too narrow minded about what wealth means. To most people it means fancy watches, cars, homes, etc. To me wealth is about time and freedom. I can pick up the tab at dinner for a group of 12. I can afford to keep my 1972 Schwinn bicycle in tip top shape or my grandfather's jacket mended when it breaks. I can afford to rent forever if I want. I'll never work a job I don't like, I can just quit. I feel more wealthy this way than if I owned 3 lambos and had to work to make ends meet.

> I’ve been tempted to by exotic cars as an example but have found if I just rent one for a day or two that urge goes away, it’s just a toy to me

> I don’t want other people seeing me as flaunting wealth

Lmao.

Exotic cars are designed to be fast and fun to drive, for people that enjoy driving. You can still find them fun even if you dislike showing off. There are even some great exotic cars that look normal enough on the outside that a non car enthusiast won’t recognize them as anything unusual.

People kind of judge by what you drive around in, not that you once rented a ferrari on holiday.

FWIW Nobody I know sees me rent these cars. I usually do it while on vacation. They’re fun to drive, so it’s closer to an occasional hobby than a complete change of my lifestyle

I dont judge, you are free to do however you please, but dont act like renting expensive car is a normal human thing to do and has nothing to do with bragging about how much money you have. Its a rich person hobby.

Still feels like you're blowing it out of proportion and are judging my hobby and reading into my post as braggadocios (which it was meant to be very matter of fact and kind of the opposite if you read any of it besides what I admitted to as my indulgence). Very average income/wealth people have hobbies that cost them a couple thousand dollars a year and we all choose our own hobbies. I don't golf and there are millions of golfers that spend the same or perhaps way more as an example. I don't drink alcohol and I would guess a large portion of US adults spend more annually on beverages than I do on that one "hobby". Damn near everyone travels and that's essentially a hobby. Plenty of people go deep sea fishing or whale watching on rented yachts. I could go on but are you judgmental on their "rich person hobby" like you are of mine?

Edit: I rarely do this with HN but I'm getting troll vibes from you and so I clicked on your comment history where you lay out your unfortunate financial situation in a comment ("I have 500€ in my bank account, 3k debt and 30 years of work left ahead of me") and it all makes sense that you are just resentful or jealous. My only constructive advise is you should try not to have this attitude on HN, there are plenty of wealthy or good-to-know people here and any chance conversation could turn into something that shifts your life's trajectory. If the breadcrumbs show that you're just a troll you're basically building a wall between you and those people.

[flagged]

You just explained why you shouldn’t be here and aren’t contributing positively to the discussion. You’re being a troll.

Authentic people shouldn't be here? Interesting.

People seem to dismiss the value of humility and frugality nowadays, but I see them as important virtues that lead to a more enjoyable life. Counter intuitively, wealth can allow someone the freedom and privilege to live a simpler and more frugal life, which can feel more rewarding and fun.

For one, I like to have a connection with the place I live and the physical objects I use like my car and home- the fact that they are old things I fixed up and maintain myself gives me a sense of place, connection, and pride- just buying something expensive that someone else prepared for me would feel infantalizing and unsatisfying. I enjoy deeply understanding and being part of the history of the objects and tools I use, in a way that can’t be purchased.

Also, I think a lot of consumerism and conspicuous consumption comes from a sad and depressing place of anxiety that you aren’t good enough to make friends or find romantic partners without doing this. Many people don’t directly want or enjoy conspicuously expensive things, but are hoping it leads to social status or approval. But this inevitably means resigning yourself to essentially buying the company of people that don’t actually like you. At the extreme end you see some famously wealthy people so anxious about not being perceived as wealthy enough that they glue tacky fake plastic gold on everything they own because they’re afraid of looking poorer than billionaires. That type of narcissism is not a happy way to live, and will turn off the kind of people that would have built a genuine emotional connection with you.

Well said! A large part of my ethos is not caring what people think of me. As in, random people that don’t know me or try to make guess of my social status based on what signals I’m putting out. I care about what some people think about me, but not my financial situation more so what they think of me as a human.

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