You'd think on a form for programmers we'd all understand that moving everything to a single thread isn't optimal.

Yes, thousand times yes. How tf cultivation of tobacco is still legal? This shouldn't be an industry. There should be 3 plants per person limit and ban on sales and gifting. It's should be a controlled substance. Nicotine is the most addictive substance known to man and in tobacco it's packaged with cancer inducing garbage. How is it legal?