Or in this case, writing it in Rust...
mypy is written in Python. People have forgotten that Python is really, really slow for CPU-intensive operations. Python's performance may not matter when you're writing web service code and the bottlenecks are database I/O and network calls, but for a tool that's loading up files, parsing into an AST, etc, it's no surprise that Rust/C/even Go would be an order of magnitude or two faster than Python.
uv and ruff have been fantastic for me. ty is definitely not production ready (I see several bizarre issues on a test codebase, such as claiming `datetime.UTC` doesn't exist) but I trust that Astral will match the "crazy reality" of real Python (which I agree, is very crazy).