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A one place I worked, one of the interviews we gave had a hidden test that wasn't part of the official interview. The candidate is introduced to the person officially giving the interview, who happens to be a woman, and there was a man, whom the candidate is told is new and just shadowing the interviewer so ignore them. If the candidate only talked with the man, they didn't get an offer.

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Unless this accounted for side conversation outside the interview, this sounds utterly psychotic — and even then.

There’s an unbelievable number of false positives I’d expect from such an inane setup

Shadow interviewers are common; why would it be inane to expect an interviewee to ignore the shadow?

read it backwards; thought the shadow as the woman, and not-ignoring the shadow was the crime

How frequent was that?

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