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You were not kidding, it is toxic up to a dilution of 1:20,000 v/v . I will stop using rinse aid containing alcohol ethoxylate immediately!

https://www.jacionline.org/article/S0091-6749(22)01477-4/ful...

Commercial rinse aids at commercial application levels

a lot of domestic Rinse Aid contains alcohol ethoxylate, have a look at that https://www.ewg.org/cleaners/subcategories/26-RinseAid/?sort...

Not at the same concentration

Thanks, now to figure out how much rinse aid my dishwasher dispenses....

There usually is some initial setup where you can set how much salt (to help with hard water) and rinse aid the dishwasher should use. You can set the rinse aid to zero.