It seems to me that the article is more focused on trying to help people than trying to control them to achieve your own goals. I think there's nothing wrong with seeing your partner struggling with something, talking to them about it and coming up with ideas to help them. The tone and attitude is important, but the article even touches on that as well.

I often have the same reaction as you to people trying to modulate me in any way. But I am learning to view their intentions more positively and I often find that it ultimately helps me to let go of my stubbornness and actually self-reflect on the things about me that they're pointing out - even though it's always difficult to do.