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Comment by lgkk | Hacker News Reader

If you’re a normal person you’re better off just going offline and seeking actual connections.

Most of these open relationship and poly whatever people.. kinda weird people to begin with. Let them live online and in therapy. It’s just not a normal way to live regardless of how much people defend it lol so the sooner normal people realize that happiness and love is found offline the better.

Personally I am all in on VR and stuff like that so normal people can finally enjoy being outside while all the others are forever online doing whatever. Not my problem, it’s contained. Everyone will have a place they can find happiness which is the most utilitarian solution.

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"It’s just not a normal way to live regardless of how much people defend it lol"

Growing up in the 80s I heard this all the time from the people around me, but in reference to being gay. I'm glad I shrugged that off.

One difference IME is that everyone I know who went down the open-relationship did it to try and solve their current relationship problems. No gay person I know decided to be gay to try and solve their problems.

> No gay person I know decided to be gay to try and solve their problems.

I suppose problems could arise by trying not to be gay in a time/place where it's been deemed abnormal or immoral, hence just being the gay person you are would solve some of those problems. If you're incapable of being faithful in a monogamous relationship, that's a real concern and a huge red flag, but one way to solve ot in the near-term would be to stop trying monogamous relationships, whether or not it's the cause or effect of it not working. Suppose you eventually go to therapy and realize you were habitually cheating for some other reason, problem is still mitigated somewhat by avoiding the context where those problems arise, much like avoiding skid row when drug addiction causes you problems.

Sounds like a normal thing to do, if you ask me, to try a different kind of relationships if you have problems with your current relationship.

> If you’re a normal person you’re better off just going offline and seeking actual connections.

The majority of US folks find relationship partners via apps these days. It's nearly the only actively-looking place remaining.

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