Not saying these will solve your problems, but it may help give it a little perspective at least:

https://www.opslevel.com/resources/optimizing-engineering-co...

https://fernandovillalba.substack.com/p/improving-engineerin...

I do not have a straight answer, but one thing that I saw working is the concept of “Good fences” where folks still act as a team but has clear touch points related with problems and when things goes south everyone knows what to do.