Like… people do get addicted to caffeine right? I know people who drink a very large amount of coffee, who “can’t function” without it, and who generally seem to be in a pretty bad shape.

The behavior of a certain segment of the population with regard to coffee looks a hell of a lot like the stereotypical addictions to drugs, including just ending up in bad shape. Totally anecdotal of course but “caffeine in large amounts bad” aligns with a lot of human behavior.