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Comment by ekianjo | Hacker News Reader

The social animal bullshit is a myth. You can see it around you everyday. People in public places everywhere spending time on their phones rather than talking to people around them

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It's true that we can see them everywhere but you'll probably notice that you don't know what jobs such people do and that those who you know and who need to benefit from others' experience typically do not do this. I tend to think there is a class (and a large one) of people who live only for their phone and social networks just because they have no life and they're trying to get one in such superficial stuff. Or maybe they just feel that nobody looks at them because they're not redefining the world and are not interesting, and they're trying to exist through groups of other people like them. It often makes me sad to see how they can be absorbed by these non-sense activities instead of simply being proud of what they are.

What happens when we swap phone with a hobby? I can't blame someone for feeling bad about themselves after putting themself out there and being ignored or hated on. On global networks, that feeling is somewhat amplified because it starts to feel like nobody would find you interesting, out of 9 billion people.

Why should we feel interesting? Well, I personally would not want to socialize with someone who found me boring. The juice should be worth the squeeze.

I am curious about your view on pride. The idea of pride is somewhat alien to me. What is there for an average Joe to be proud of? Most of us are trapped in an oppressive economic situation and are forever distracted from any meaningful goals in our lives by responsibilities and society's selfish expectations.

The loss of third places exacerbates the problem. People don't belong in their own communities, and they feel it.

"It often makes me sad to see how they can be absorbed by these non-sense activities instead of simply being proud of what they are."

....because "being proud of what you are" doesn't work when no one cares about what you do or who you are. Then, your options are two-fold: you either become an isolated loner who doesn't care about socialising, or you participate in those superficial activities in hope of human connection.

Third option, you focus on family. Not sure why this was left out.

because the phone was more important.

Maybe it’s not a myth, in a sense that without a phone they had to interact and learn how to do it, but that is too bad compared to what phones give for free.

You ever see that old black and white picture of folks on the NY subway in the 1940s, all reading their own newspaper?

Forcing conversation on random people you happen to be sharing a space with has always been psychopath behavior.

Completely wrong. People are glued to social networks & co precisely because it mimics social interaction.

Phones and social networks are so heavily used because they are addictive.

Hence that defeats the social animal myth if our minds can be captured by something inherently non human

No it doesn't, false dichotomy. Addiction can coexist with socialising, see pubs for evidence of that. Also, the instincts that drive us to be sociable may also make aspects of social networks enticing. In the same way that desire for sex drives porn use. We can not always tell the difference between artificial experience and real.

How does this reconcile with learning and the internet? Or books? The assumption that someone is using the addictive apps or services is the flaw in your argument.

Same with bars, people can go to a bar not for the purpose of socializing at all. They may simply want to get away from home and be left alone while drinking some beers at the bar. Maybe the in-laws are in town. I do this myself.

Some people don’t need socialization and yet aren’t “loners”, their focus is just elsewhere. Trying to state all humans are social creatures is what a few posts up is about. Not everybody is the same, haven’t we learned that already?

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