Baby showers, gender reveal parties, pre-partum stays at "mom suites" in spas/hotels, all those Instagram moments that make people feel stressed and like they're not in the right income bracket to get into having a family.
Save your money, folks. Spend it on high-quality toys, books, childhood travel. Save money so you have to work less and can spend time together. That's what your child will benefit from.
We had a wonderful midwife who told us her secondary function was basically to reality-check parents on what gear, clothes, events, price points, etc. they actually need. Get the basics right, she would say, and deeply understand why they are basic and necessary, and otherwise save your time and money for stuff that matters long-term.
Given that she’s raised four kids, I tend to believe her.
No need for boys or girls clothes, the dressing up thing is really for adults
Your 70 year-old mother is right. There really is so much useless shit for babies now, and very little of it actually solves a real problem that new parents have.
The rules of thumb for us are:
- Don't buy anything until you actually have an imminent need for it. Simplest way to avoid useless shit altogether!
- Where possible, get used on FB Marketplace or Gumtree. It's generally 80% cheaper than new, and you can resell when you're done to get the money you spent on it back. (Or, just give away to friends)
- Get products with less features, not more. When you're sleep deprived and stressed to the end of your tether, the last thing you want to do is work out how a whole lot of different attachments work. If you don't have a pram yet, the Baby Joggers are great at this. They do one thing (single-handed compact fold) and do it well.
Now, he's getting bigger, meaning those $3 dollar pjs now cost $9, as it's more cloth to create, but the sentiment is still there!