"This is clearly bait. Pretending this gigabit internet service is available or practical for a startup, much less personal use, is either dishonest or ignorant of the actual situation in Chattanooga."
What are you talking about? I do believe you are the one ignorant of the actual situation in Chattanooga. Gigabit internet service IS available to startups. Hell, its available to residential customers.
https://epbfi.com/enroll/packages/#/fi-speed-internet-1000
I've got the 30Mbps package at home, and it is a true 30meg up and down. They laid fiber all over the city, and it is 100x better than any other internet services I've ever had(I don't think my internet has been down one time since I moved to Chattanooga).
"Generally your choices are making a decent salary working in healthcare with .NET/Java, or making <30k salaries with open source, which generally doesn't go much further than CMS modifications, or working for a CTO that thinks php frameworks are fadish and don't really work in most situations (so he rolled his own)."
I'm making ~50k working for a startup, using ruby, nodejs, mongo, redis...all kinds of open source. And we're hiring.
"And even there, I won't even talk to local companies. I've already wasted enough time hunting local clients only to realize nary a one of them expects to pay > $20/hr."
Not gonna argue with this one :)
I think you are a bit behind the times as to whats going on in Chattanooga.