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I don't like SUVs, and would probably never buy one myself, but I would much rather live with having killed someone else in a car crash, than not living with it, because I'm dead.

You're also ignoring the case where the other driver causes a crash, and dies, but you live. Sure, you're probably still not going to feel great about the situation, and may suffer some emotional issues, but I don't think too many people would say they'd prefer they were in a smaller car and died instead.

That’s possibly true, but even so, that’s still better for my kids and family than if I’m dead. (For the record, both of our daily drivers are well under the average size/weight for US cars, but I understand the appeal of a car/SUV perceived as “safer for me; screw thee”.)

That's obviously not the only accident that can happen. Someone can rear end you while you are parked, and I'm pretty sure everyone would rather be in a larger vehicle in that case.

It’s not even clear that bigger cars are safer for their occupants anymore. The last time it held close to true was in the early 90s.